Fine, n u?

This will get me in trouble with quite a few people and to a large extent I am fine with this. I really despise the modern texting trait/fashion. I don’t hate communicating, not that I am very good at it but I definitely do not hate it. What I do hate is this idea that texting promotes whereby what should be common language skills as well as the sharing of everyday life is tossed aside in exchange for highlights of life, whether fake or real, and really poor conversation skills in a none relationship pursuit context. It is literally moving backwards. Let me break this down

Yet we insist on continuing with the lie

The generic “Hi/Hey” I can buy, after all it is simply hello. I can even buy the variations of “How are you” but the whole “Fine n u” bit, I’m just not having that. No one is fine all the time and even if you are. How is that of any benefit to the conversation? If something happened in a day that has caused some change in your day or outlook on life that is what to talk about. This whole “Fine n u” business comes from the idea that you need to give highlights of life only. The kinds of stories that will fill the other person with a proper view of you but that’s not life. Life and living is made up of the little bits and pieces that turn us into who we are, those little bits and pieces are what form conversation.

Another thing I can stand is the “and you” response to everything. You know what I mean, everything turns into a reverse question, almost boomerang like. “How are you? Fine, and you? Fine. How was your day? Good, and you?” What kind of a conversation is that? Imagine that conversation face to face with someone? That is a suicide inducing face to face conversation. What kind of a world is this turning into whereby people cannot think further than to fire back the same question. Believe it or not conversation is a two way thing. It is a giving and receiving of information. It is taking a deliberate move to find out what is going on in another person’s life and people share when you share, not when you keep firing back annoying “and you’s”

I also despise the myth of a boring life. This is a very common line these days, “I have nothing to say, my life is boring”. Life is not the number of times you have been atop Mt. Kilimanjaro or the moments you were at the beach or the times you were out with friends, life is that and so much more, It is the moments in between. It is the way you felt when you woke up and the weather was not too promising, it is the joke you enjoyed with your sibling in the morning, it is the nagging of a sister who spends hours in the bathroom. It is the book you have read and why it is fascinating or not so fascinating, it is how you felt about the goings on in the world, IT IS ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU AND WITH YOU. Limiting yourself to the highlights is showing other people a lie about yourself, why do that to yourself?

Uhhhh... No it's not. Life is everything all together, the highs and the lows

I have touched a little on this but another thing is the expectance of information when you offer none. This is not a magazine interview and you are not an award winning journalist. Why should one open up to you about anything if you can open up about anything? Do you not see the fault in that logic? You expect answers constantly yet you give none. You can also never get a full picture of someone till you understand the little bits that form the whole.

I think there is a certain self-centred-ness associated with texting that has more to do with what you want than the person on the other end. “I’m asking the questions and you are not giving answers so you are boring”, when in actual fact you have a lot to do with the lack of info coming from the other end. I too have been and occasionally am guilty of such but the conscious decision has to be made to avoid such mannerisms. Such pointless conversation lines that knaw at the very fabric of what is and should be proper conversation must be put to death. Its lazy conversation, because it’s lazy it’s easy and because it is easy it takes serious conscious decision to stop it.

But thats just me.. what do I know

Hi, My Name Is Cain

This morning on the way to Church I begun to mentally do the math as to how much to put in the offering bag. I’m not going to tell you how much I came up with, that would be awkward. A bit of a history behind that is that I tend to divide the amount of money I will put into the offering each month by the number of Sundays then put in the required amount each Sunday, I just feel better that way. So as I did the math it dawned on me that doing that was easy, the idea of me giving my tithes and offerings was easy and this really bothered. This here is me explaining why

I'm not an addict but there is some relevance

So I tend to think of myself as a pretty simple guy. I’m not big on new clothes, new gadgets or even going out much, I make two or three calls a week and I barely text, my sister is not too big a fan of that last one. The main things I spend my money on are two things; school and coca cola. I AM NOT ADDICTED TO COKE! I just like it a lot. This means I occasionally have a little money on the side which I might use every couple months to entertain me. The thing is because I don’t buy much the idea of me putting money into the offering is not sacrifice and that is where I draw my comparison with Cain. But allow me to elaborate more

You see Cain was the first born son of the first man, Adam, and the first woman, Eve. He was a farmer by trade, one would imagine him toting Tomatoes and onions to his mother at the end of the working day so she could whip up something nice for them. I also Imagine Cain was pretty good at his Job, there is nothing to support that but I just don’t buy into the idea that Cain was this lazy guy who brought poor veggies to God as his offering, No. I also do not think that God was displeased with Cain because he brought veggies instead of a lamb like his brother did. God expects us to give him the best of what we have because he gave us all we have. It’s only right to do so.

Ever the bad guy in the pictures, all because you cant burn veggies right??

I think Cain’s problem lay in his poor priorities. In my minds eye, that is my imagination, I figure Cain saved his best food for his meal and brought his second best produce to God. I also don’t think he gave God the scraps, that has to be mentioned. I think his priorities where wrong, maybe he was even naïve enough to think God would not know or care that he gave him what was of secondary importance to him

Bringing it back to me, I have been content with giving God my money every couple Sundays and thinking that is fine when in actual fact I have been guilty of the sin of Cain. My money is the secondary thing of importance in my life, to some it might be the first but I know for a fact that to me it is the second most important thing. The most important thing to me is my time. I might squander it here and there but that is the one thing that I have held dear to me and kept in an isolated chamber, giving God some but not his due share. I have been going to God and giving him my secondary produce and whether it be knowingly or unknowingly it is still not giving God what he deserves.

Period

I am Cain in that I give God what is of secondary importance to me and not what rightly belongs to him of what is of primary importance. I am Cain because I think what I am giving is fine and do not think of looking any further into it to find out if what I am doing is right or wrong. I am Cain because I am also prone to jealousy when a brother at the next table is growing in faith and I seem stagnant, not caring to look at what he is doing right and I’m doing wrong but just judging and hating. I am Cain because when push comes to shove it is easier to turn my back on God an grumble than fall on my knees and repent

I am Cain but I am not Cain. I am not Cain because I still have the chance to turn this around. I am not Cain because I have seen the error of my ways and though I may fall time and time again I can begin to work on this with God’s grace. And more importantly I am not Cain because there is hope for me yet, alas there is hope for me yet.

Hello my name is Cain but my name is also Mwansa

The Classics

Old is gold. It’s a phrase I heard for a long time by many people but never really appreciated or understood. I spent most of my life trying to defy it till one day I woke up and it looked me point blank in the face, old is gold. This isn’t just because gold is old though I’m sure it is, the meaning goes deeper than this. Allow me to give you, my one reader, my view on “Old is gold”.

My need to write about this started around 5 43pm today, I know because I  looked at my phone checking for the time around that time but that is not the place to start a good story so I will begin with my afternoon class. The class was some Landscaping class and I was not ready for it, sorry mum if you stumble across this but it happened. Anyhoo, we were supposed to show the lecturers our Site Analysis’, it was a group project, but thanks to poor time management we had the pieces but no cake. So the job started, to get cake together, we managed to do so and using my “gift of the gab” we made it across the finish line just fine. Then the lecs, short for lecturers, asked us to begin work on our concepts.

I pulled out my little sketch book and started to draw, this was after my afternoon coke, but realised I had nothing on me mind. So I picked up me phone and googled “outdoor recreational spaces” I came across this picture of a park that was simple but it took me. I did my math, adding my analysis of the site and the picture I saw and my mind saw the idea, I just had to run with it. The image was clear, I could see the place, see the people using the place. I could see it at 4pm with the school kids walking home through it, the young mothers looking out on it from their balconies while their babies fell asleep in their arms, I could see the old guys having a smoke playing backgammon in it. I could see a young couple on a picnic blanket enjoying the moment. I saw it, I smelt it and I felt it. And I sketched.

My sketching was ended with the lecturers inviting us to the official opening of the Faculty of Fine Arts in the main Amfi Theatre on Campus. It was actually under duress because the attendance could only be signed after the event, I wasn’t even mad, I got to kill two birds with one stone. We went in, they had the usual speeches, I won’t bore you with the details and then there was a music session. That was the time I looked at me phone, I thought the launch had begun to end too soon. I soon forgot all about that as two ladies stepped up, one on the Piano and one on the violin. They were Turkish ladies, both lecturers but from a different University. They had their degrees in music which I thought fascinating but I was even more impressed when they played. They took me to a time and place, it was a transcendent experience.

That's where the took me, A time and place

All else faded away, the noise of the room. The guys doodling on small pieces of paper at my side. My body aching from all the sitting I had done. The bag by my leg that would not stay still. All was forgotten as I was immersed, carried by the music. It was music by George Frederick Handel, commonly known as the celebrated Saxon. The levels of mastery involved in the playing of the piece on both their parts. The movement and grace that they showed, the poise, the accents and the rests; it was picturesque. As they played I thought of my little sketches and in that moment I knew what I wanted to design. I wanted to design that. That space, that time, that moment.

Old is gold. Modern art forms of all kinds are great and their evolution mind blowing on so many levels but there is a lot and I mean a lot of beauty that can be seen from the root of it. Old is gold implies the value of that which has seen its time. As a young person I have grown up seeing techniques and styles and have grown accustomed to doing things a certain way because of technology etc. but old stuff makes you appreciate how people achieved so much with so little. Especially in art. How words thought and feeling can be transmitted through an art form that had yet to realise as much of what it was doing as can. We are studying now to appreciate and learn to use what came before because the achievements of those that came before are just great.

It all comes down to that

Old is gold speaks of us learning from a bygone time and period lessons that can be applied today in every aspect and not just the arts but I will give an example of the arts, cos that’s what I do. A lot of design in the minds of my contemporaries starts and ends digital but the ability to represent what you think and feel at a moment’s notice on paper with pencil/pen/marker cannot be matched. That form of “thinking on paper” is really old but its relevance stays true and once you begin to use it and see the depths of it, you see that old is gold.

Old is gold speaks of the value of age, not in that old is better than new. I don’t think it means that in the least. I think old is gold speaks of remembering the old and learning from it, cherishing it. So much can be taken from the old, so many lessons that are relevant today whether in part or as a whole. Whether directly or improved on. But even more Old is gold puts pressure on me, that when the time comes for people to look back on my time, they too may see it and say “You know what man, old is gold.”

“Bring back our girls”, A letter to the other guys

About five months a group of three hundred girls were kidnapped from their school in Nigeria by a terrorist group called Boko Haram, if you haven’t heard of them by now you must either be totally immersed in all things Syria/Iraq or living under a rock. I didn’t hear about the kidnapping for a day or two myself as my interest in the news is like the tide on a sandy beach, with it being absent more than it is present. I heard of it for the first time through twitter, a Nigerian friend of mine had tweeted a number of things with the now famous Hash Tag #BringBackOurGirls. I initially let it slide but after five of these my curiosity gave way and I finally checked what the hype was all about. Now I am usually anti hype and try to stay away from all things hype, a friend refers to my tendency to do this as me being an old soul. When I saw the news I was appalled. It annoyed me to no end as it did millions around the world, to good effect too.

Now with all things that gain hype, after a couple days there was some backlash from people criticising the use but more the abuse of the Hash Tag. The main concern was that there were a lot of attention seeking people who latched onto the Hash Tag but had no real love or interest in the things happening on the ground. I was not one of the people who used the Hash Tag a lot in my Tweets but I regularly checked it to get news on what was going on on the ground. I have to admit that I was one of those who was against the attention seeking users of the Hash Tag, I was especially against those who used it as a joke. All this has been a disorganised back drop to what I actually want to address.

So a day or two ago I came across a conversation on Facebook concerning the disappearance of the Hash Tag and a guy kicked in criticising the use of the Hash Tag and these where his reasons. One, that Boko Haram are not on Twitter and so they would not see the Hash Tag Trending and think to themselves “Man, people are really getting behind this, let’s take these kids back”, my words not his exactly. And two, that the people who were using it were only in it for face time and an opportunity to make relevant their otherwise boring existence, once again my words not his. Now I am sure you have come across these arguments before. I think they are flawed and should be binned the moment they rear their ugly heads.

One of the first responses to the anti Hash Tag movement

First and foremost I would like to say that the idea behind these arguments is not completely wrong in that there are people who are attention seekers and latching onto the movement to get themselves face time. But my problem lies in a self-righteous standing back and putting asunder all the good work that is being done. There are people like me who knew about the kidnapped girls through the use of the #BringBackOurGirls Hash Tag and it was a source of information in a lot of regards as to who the culprits were, where they came from, and their reasons for the kidnapping etc. The gathering of information on such an important matter affecting our fellow men is in no way a bad thing.

A lot of aid was made available through the awareness brought about by the Hash Tag. I can imagine some level of comfort as well for the families that were in crisis that there was some level of support from the outside world and they are not alone. The purpose of people coming to comfort you in a funeral setup, especially on the African continent is not because people know the right thing to say to make it all better but the very presence of people either in person or through some form of communication makes the bereaved feel less alone. There is some nonsense that came from the use of the Hash Tag but there is a baby in the bath water and we best not throw the baby out with the bath water.

Critics and self professed professionals risk throwing out the good with the bad

But this issue does not just end with Boko Haram and the Kidnapped girls. It is easy to sit back and criticise the efforts of people and speak of how their plans will not work. People who do that are called scoffers by the Bible, David in Psalm 1 goes as far as describing scoffing as an action performed whilst seated. Scoffing at a problem and the attempts of people happens when you your self are doing nothing and that is a common trait amongst humans, I am guilty of it a lot and so could the one other person who is reading the rants of this moron named Mwansa. But if we can see a problem why not go as far as solving the problem or helping to solve it, bring something more to the table than just pointless complaints about people’s inadequacy.

I wrote something about this before and the fire and passion for it still grows strong in me for it. The need for people to bring something more to the table than complaints and grumbles. I see bigger, I see better, I see a world in which the use of #BringBackOurGirls by men like Erasmus Mweene does not allow us to forget what is still a major problem for our Nigerian counterparts. And now with news of the potential release of the girls, as much as I hope the Hash Tag may never be used again in that there should be no more kidnapping, whether mass or otherwise, I do hope that causes like it can unite people around a cause bigger than themselves for the good of people other than themselves. I see a future, a bright one, sue me

The National Anthem: Beat my chest bang my drum and shout from the rooftop

This one has been the one that has given me the most thought of the final three. I knew what “today in parliament would be” and I had a basic construct of “the epilogue” but the national anthem, that one has troubled. I figured it out after waking up from the nap that I just woke up from, in short I figured it out five minutes ago. If you want to split hairs you can say this is improvising on my part but it really isn’t.

For those of you intent on splitting hairs

So yesterday I had a conversation with a guy who ridiculed my blogging, not the first and won’t be the last. People have a funny impression of bloggers and a lot of the misconceptions come from those who pay too much attention to shows like gossip girl. This is a theory, because I have not watched gossip girl, granted in a moment of weakness I actually thought about it, what can I say I was bored. Anyway the main point of the conversation was why do you blog. I’m not someone who people want to sit down and read his every thought like my father. And I’m not a thirteen year old girl talking about celebrity gossip. So why do you blog?

I’m quite the charismatic thinker, so the moment I thought of this I immediately pictured myself standing on a rooftop in some African warrior attire, with the Rambo polish under my eyes, can’t leave that out, beating my chest and banging my drum simultaneously telling the world why I write. It’s not a poem, it’s not a song. Its words, it’s my National anthem

I would be the guy in front, just of a negroid persuasion

I write because I can, I write because I should. It helps keep me in check because I frequently put my thoughts down somewhere, not just on the blog. I keep track of who I was and what I want to be through what I write and what I wrote. I write to tell everyone what is important to me, I write to tell them in my own weird way how much of a mess it is in my head and yet I am willing to use my hopelessness for Gods cause and he is more than willing to take my poor something and turn into something more.

I write not for the fame or the prestige, in all likelihood I will not get it. I write not to have my name exalted or thought of more. I write not to look like a deep thinker because I’m not, I’m actually quite stupid. I make the same mistakes over and over and over again and yet because God keeps picking me up I can’t help but tell someone something. I write not to speak of me, I write to speak of him through me. If all you see in what I write is me then I have messed up, really messed up. I write because unlike words that fade away these remain in the collective, stagnant, waiting to be used for me or against me. These words that remain up there long after my voice has faded in sleep, silence or death will be there to remind me of who I am and who I was.

I write because to some extent I am driven by my passion. I try not to let it control me but every once in a while it does. My passion for my God and my passion for my country. My passion that leads me to write about what’s wrong and what’s right. Leads me to write about how people conclude too fast or sometimes think too little. All this is my opinion but I write because I have a message for the collective that I want them to know and me sitting in my quiet corner of the world does nothing for that. I could watch the world rot and scoff or I can do what I can, I can write.

I write because this is my journey, my journal of my Journey in Cyprus. I write because I figure this is not the end but merely a chapter of my life. I write because I want to savour these moments that I have had over here, the words will help me remember the time. The words will refresh the memory, the words will pain the heart and drive it on to do more. If I ever become complacent I will look back on the thoughts of a younger me and be ashamed. If I go from strength to strength I will look back on the thoughts of a younger me and nod with approval.

As I look back later on in life, I wonder what I will see

I write to help others but I especially write to help me. Because I know I am weak and I constantly need reminding. Every time I put my hands to the keyboard I come to a burning realisation of my flaws and my falls. There are times when I want to write and I know that my life has not been what I want to write and this is a burden that has brought me back to my lord in prayer many a time. I write to let those I speak to rarely know what’s happening with me. I write for many reasons but as I stand here on a roof top, granted a proverbial one, rhythmically beating my chest and my drum, granted a metaphorical drum, the main reason why I write is because I have a deep desire in me to speak of my God and whether you listen and read or not, I’m not sure, but because he has done so much for me… How can I not write?

The Epilogue: Things that hit me in season 3

I wanted to call this lessons learnt but couldn’t bring meself to put that into the tittle so there you go. As for season 3, this is me third spell in North Cyprus, I have been home for the summer break twice making this season 3. So after nine months in North Cyprus a couple of things have come across to me clearer. Some I knew and needed emphasis and others are just plain old new. They are in no particular order but the important ones are mentioned and emphasized.

But before I get into them a bit of back ground. When I first came to North Cyprus I was coming on my own, which is a typical story among those who go to study abroad, I’m not looking for sympathy or applause, I’m just painting a picture here. I knew no one and it was pretty much this one guy in foreign land. I travelled with three other Zambians but had little or no interest in talking to them much let alone befriending them, now they are friends though some more than others. My plan when coming here was keep your head down, get your degree and get out. In short I was an assassin on a covert military operation. I even did the John Rambo polish under the eyes bit.

That was me ready for battle, but i cant do the lip thing, I'm a smiler

Fast forward to this spell here, season three, and a lot has changed, a lot has also remained the same. This here is a little bit of that.

Hit 1: Never mix Coca Cola and Charger. So charger is this energy drink that is sold on campus. It is by and larger probably the most consumed bevy on campus. It is cheap, ridiculously cheap, it does the job and doesn't taste too bad either. Naturally I like it. Plus a six pack of it costs slightly more than a single can of Coke, in short, SOLD!! And they have cases and cases of the stuff, it never seems to run out. I am a huge fan of the Coca Cola Franchise and A big, not huge, fan of the Charger one and so it really pained me to discover that you should NEVER drink Coca Cola followed soon after by Charger, not even Charger followed by Coca Cola. What can I say, I was looking for a solution. Nuff said.

I did this in season two as an assignment. Just to show my fascination with coke.
Not and addiction, A fascination

Hit 2: This I learnt in my infancy but has been proven true this semester in particular. It’s from a song they taught us at bible club called “Read your bible pray every day” which coincidentally is about… you guessed it, reading your bible and praying every day. The hit comes from the second verse which says “Neglect your bible, forget to pray and you’ll shrink, shrink, shrink. And you’ll shrink, shrink, shrink. And you’ll shrink, shrink, shrink. Neglect your bible forget to pray and you’ll shrink, shrink, shrink.” Massive depth eh... but what can I say, it’s taught to 5, 6 and 7 year old's so it has to be basic. But the lesson rings true and I have felt it deeply

Hit 3: You fall down, you get up. This is more spiritual than physical or academic so those looking for a motivational section, you’re not in luck. When in a spiritual stupor, when at the bottom of the ditch. When you feel so dirty and filthy you have no place else to reach but up. So reach up and ask God for forgiveness and to “restore your soul” and “lead you beside the still waters”. God is all knowing and saved me in full knowledge of the absolute depravity of my heart and how often I would stray. He did not weigh the opportunity cost, he did not think once or twice about me being a good investment. He picked me knowing all my flaws and saved me. So in my stupor, I learned to reach up. This however is a lesson I will learn more and more till my dying day

Hit 4: The world is a bad, no, a terrible place but what are you going to do about it. One of the problems with studying abroad is a lot of the people who do come here are people with the mind-set of children. I’m not making fun, it’s the truth. Its people who think life is all fun and games and lack seriousness. I saw this more and more and it baffled me, I would sit and talk about how I have given up and I’m not interested in helping people who don’t want to be helped but God taught me different. I did not hear a sound from heaven or see a vision but in my time of quiet surrender it hit me that my attitude was not an attitude that is befitting of one who is Christ-like, after all that is all a Christian is. The difference between a Christian and a scoffer is not in terms of sight. In reality they both see the same evil and a lot exaggerate to the same degree. The difference is that the Christian is driven to do something about it, to show people the light of Christ. There is a thin line between Christian and scoffer in that sense and I was sitting with the scoffers for quite a while. I hope not to go back.

You can keep standing and point out problems or you can actually do something to show the the light

Hit 5: Talk to somebody. To date I’m not sure if I am noisy or quiet. I like to think of it as me having a switch that I can flick at will and turn into loud me or quiet me but truth be told, I’m not really sure. The problem with quiet me is that he keeps it all in and the problem with keeping it all in is that eventually it becomes too much and you either burst or break. It helps to have people around you that you can talk to about sensible things and speak to about your struggles. Being in Cyprus has made that very difficult but this time around I have generally managed. I will only mention one name because he is unlikely to read this, Miz, thanks a lot mate. The other/s you have been invaluable.

Hit 6: Never leave to tomorrow what you can do today. My first semester upon arrival in season three I relied on talent alone to get me through and to some extent it worked. I’m not claiming to be Leonardo Da Vinci or anything but I am fairly good at what I do. But it was the most unfulfilling semester I have ever had, school wise, on other fronts it was quite productive, see The Troublesome Roommate. So I promised myself that come the next semester I would push myself to do the necessary when necessary and this semester that has just ended has been my best. Little or no procrastination led me to finishing my final project almost three weeks before the final, which is quite rare. School wise it has been fulfilling and I hope to go from strength to strength in that regard.

I could learn a thing or two from the soldiers will to call home and the feeling afterwards

Hit 7: This is my last to mention. It’s not the most important neither is it the least but it is something that I have had to learn and is not easy for a person like me to remember and continue. I’m not the clingiest individual and this practice has cost me quite a few friendships along the way. I would always phrase it this way, “I communicate little so the little counts when it happens” but the truth is I need to hear from the mother ship, not just my mum but her too, more often than I do. It is a hard lesson for me to keep track of but I hope to one day be good at it. The lesson simply put is this CALL HOME. Unfortunately or is it fortunately I won’t have the chance to practice that soon as I am going home but we’ll see how that works out in Season four

Today In Parliament: My conversations with a homosexual

When I was younger, this is before I turned 10, I had this suspicion that the local TV channel would play all the cartoons that they cut off prematurely towards the end of broadcast. No idea where I got that from, probably one of those things my brother told me to test how gullible I was. So whenever my parents would slip up and forget to tell us to go to bed, which was very rare, they are as consistent as clocks my folks, its borderline ridiculous. Anyway whenever they would forget I would sit quietly looking at the TV hoping my theory was right, I was silent because any noise and they would remember I was there and send me to bed.  I distinctly remember how after the final show there would be three things that would follow, that was the only thing ZNBC, the local broadcaster, were consistent about. They were: Today in Parliament, The Epilogue and The National Anthem. After these the screen would go blank and there would be an annoying high pitched sound that would not go away, to my utter disappointment.

As I was thinking of how to wrap up my Journey in Cyprus for the summer break I remembered this slice of my childhood and decided to go with that. For the few who have read my Journey in Cyprus and have noticed my silence for the past month or so, I have been writing exams. I would rather write during my next spell here than have this as my last instalment and go home prematurely. That and I think my Dad would kill me if I failed, just kidding he would just give me a mental beating, he has that down to a science. So down to Today in Parliament: My conversations with a homosexual.

A couple months back I came across a man on the interweb who was a pastor but after announcing his homosexuality to the congregation was no longer a pastor. Now he runs a blog about a lot of things but the main point of it is reconciling his homosexuality with being a Christian. After reading through what he had to say, I was intrigued into seeing what he had to say about the bible’s pretty much obvious anti-gay message. Below lies our correspondence, it is ongoing but I will give you what is there so far. A few things before you read the content of it. Firstly I will not disclose his name or blog for personal reasons, a few of you will understand. Secondly, the way I tackled the situation is my way of doing things and you might disagree but what can you do, its my Journey in Cyprus. Lastly, and I will build on this more at the end, the Bible will only ever speak to us if we prayerfully read through it and look at it as what God wants to say and not what we want it to say. So here you go

Mwansa: I found your blog through a picture that I was searching for to illustrate my point on my blog. Funny name you got for yours though. My question is how do you reconcile your message with the bible's blatant anti-gay message? The closest I can get to an answer would be you believe the bible but not all of it but I would like to hear your answer

Other Guy: Hey Mwansa! Thanks for the message.

Reconciling my faith and my sexuality was a journey that took upwards of 15 years. I came from within deep fundamentalism, and God brought me to the message of grace over the course of years.

I would first respond that, yes, I do believe the Bible is the inspired word of God. I believe that the Holy Spirit compiled all 66 books together. However, I do not believe it is a Constitution. It has been translated numerous times, in numerous languages, and if you read it at face-value, you aren't going to get to the heart of the message therein. Everything must be contextualized in its proper language. So, while in seminary, I went back to the Hebrew and Greek. This took years of study, but I have compiled an abbreviated version if you're interested in reading:

*left out for my own reasons as stated above*

On this page, I take the seven verses used against homosexuality, and go back to the original language within context. Take a read of the articles if you're interested in learning more.

At the end of the day, it falls to this, though: Jesus always erred on the side of love when dealing with religious matters. No matter where you land on this issue, theologically, just remember that Jesus lived, died, and rose again, just for the purpose of reconciling the world to Himself - Himself being love embodied (1 John 4:8). So, always focus on this aspect of the message. Is my theology leading me to love? Or leading me to exclusion? These are the questions I think Jesus would have us ask. Always remember to test everything (1 Thess. 5:21). This includes new teaching, and old.

Much love, and I look forward to hearing from you again.

Mwansa: I have read a couple of your clobber verses posts and I must say, it’s an interesting view of things. I still don’t agree with you in the least. In my view homosexuality is a direct assault on the institute of marriage and that is the one I would like to hear you reconcile.

I’m given to understand that marriage is a sort of metaphor or earthly example of Gods relationship to the church, one man one woman. Now changing the principle of marriage from one man to one woman to man and man or woman and woman is changing the example that God left to us for us to see our relationship with God. The paradigm changes completely.

My take on homosexuality is that it’s not just a love/sex issue, it’s a lot more than that. It's a direct contradiction to the marriage issue and a contradiction to that is a contradiction to the entire idea of the church a couple steps lower than that leads us to a domino effect if you will that alters the message of the bible and I believe that to be impossible.

So my question is, how is the homosexual "movement" not an attack on Gods principle of marriage? How do you reconcile the two?

Lastly I wanted to mention that the bible does not frequently speak against homosexuality because it is frequently speaking for marriage. Speaking for one is in reality speaking against the other

Other Guy: Sorry for the late response. It's been a busy time. I will simply say that I don't believe it's an "attack" on God's principle of marriage, because our current understanding of marriage does not come from Scripture - it comes from Victorian England. Scriptural marriage is, in fact, polygamy, with many different facets. For example, if a man died, his wife was to be married to his brother, etc. These mandates were even in place during Jesus' time. Even in the era of the New Testament, marriage was about property investment, and had little to do with love. Look into the history of marriage, and you may be surprised by what you find. Almost every one of our marriage traditions come from this time when a woman was "bought" by her husband from her father. Marriage is a social contract that the church adopted.

Mwansa: Ahhhh.. Another point where I disagree. The law given by Moses might not have expressly or explicitly spoken against that but the new covenant is the one that explicitly speaks of how the relationship between man and wife is a replica/parable/metaphor of the relationship between God and the church. Hence polygamy and homosexuality are direct attacks on Gods image of marriage. If you make both parties male, the picture is skewed. Both parties female, once again the picture is skewed. If you add another in the picture, whether male or female the result is the same. A skewed picture.

Lastly, the ceremony may vary according to one’s location but the principle behind Christian marriage is the same, should be the same all over. Marriage should help us picture and understand the relation of God with his bride, the church.

Am I making any sense?

Other Guy: I understand the metaphor. I've taught the metaphor numerous times. But, Jesus used metaphors every time he spoke. Just because he used a metaphor didn't mean he was giving a direct command. Jesus also said that the Kingdom of Heaven is like: A farmer (Matt. 13:24); A mustard seed (Matt. 13:31); A king (Matt. 18:23); A net (Matt. 13:47); A merchant (Matt. 13:45); Yeast (Matt. 13:33); A barn (Matt. 3:12); A sower of good seed (Matt. 13:24); A treasury (Matt.6:19); Father's house -Jn14:2. None of these - or any of Jesus' metaphors - are meant to be taken as literal commands, but rather as ways of understanding God. When Paul speaks of this in Ephesians, I think he is doing the same thing. He is saying husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loves the Church. The same goes for 1 Corinthians. As far as the verses in Revelation that speak of "the Bride," surely you can't take those verses literally, either? Not even scholars take Revelation literally.

The reason I speak of metaphor and literality is because I want you to see that you are using *one* theology - a theology that is not even explicit in Scripture - and you are using it to further oppression of individuals that cannot help the way they feel, and their feelings are just as natural as your feelings toward the opposite sex.

There are a few things I want you to consider, however. Many scholars believe David and Jonathan's relationship was an intimate relationship. There are even verses that allude to a sexual relationship, such as when Saul tells David that "his mother's nakedness has shamed them," which is a phrase that means sexual shame, and he uses it towards David and Jonathan's relationship. Also, when Jesus heals the Roman Centurion's servant. The word the Roman uses (in the original Greek) is not a word that translates to a common slave - it's a word that translates to lover. We all know it was common practice for gay Roman men to have relationships - intimate, deep monogamous relationships - with those in servant hood. Jesus would have been very familiar with this common, social norm. Does Jesus condemn him? No. In fact, he turns to his disciples and says that there is no greater faith found in all of Israel than in this man.

These speak pretty loudly, my friend, as to how God feels about homosexuality (whenever it is in the context of intimate, monogamous relationships). But, just like you, I am speaking about Biblical metaphors and allusions. There is one thing that the Bible is metaphorical about, though: love.

1 John 3:23 (fun fact, this is actually the Bible verse that is tattooed on me!): "And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us."

Furthermore, the one thing Jesus prayed for before his death in the Garden in John 17 was unity of the Church. This didn't mean that we all agree on everything. But, it meant that in those disagreements, we learned how to love one another anyway, and didn't force our views on one another. To further that, Paul spoke at the end of Romans about those that thought different things about the faith. What did he say to do? Agree to disagree. I believe that's where we are today, and what we should focus on as we move forward. I do love you, brother, and I hope that you get to a place where, even if you can't agree with the theology of LGBT Christians, you will at least not allow your theology to further oppress others, my friend.

Mwansa: I hear but I figure you misunderstood my point, particularly my phrasing of it. A parable tells something about something not everything about something. For example when Jesus equates the kingdom of heaven to a net he was concentrating on one aspect of the net in fishing, that aspect being that the fisherman chooses which fish to keep and which fish not to keep, if memory serves me right. It does not speak of all aspects so it does not speak of how some fish can escape some nets because of the size of the holes in it etc. So when marriage is being spoken of in the New Testament, especially in the Pauline epistles it speaks of the monogamous relation between the two in some cases and the sacrificial love in others and a couple more other points, well more than a couple but I think you get my point.

I personally doubt that David and Jonathan’s friendship had sexual connotations but it was described as love passed that of a woman. This to me signifies the level of the bond or friendship between them, however I take caution in making it seem like an everyday thing because such a friendship is only mentioned once in scripture.

The roles of the man and the woman in a marriage are different. It’s nothing feminist/sexist, it's all biblical. And the major difference is seen in the relation between God and the church and how the relation between them should be emulated by husband and wife. If you make it man and man or woman and woman doesn’t that skew the picture? The roles in the relation that I am speaking of are those mentioned in Ephesians 5 vs 21-33. The whole wives submit and husbands love part

For those who have read this far I would just like to add on a paragraph of me own thoughts on this. The entire conversation as at now is before you but I can still only speak from my perspective. The bible should always be viewed as what God is saying to us and a lot of the time what he is saying is not things we want to want to accept. We all want to view God as a God who does not hate anything or gives light spanking when we are wrong but that is not what the bible says of him. Let us see God and all that is to do with the Christian life through the lens of the bible and not whatever other lens we choose because it is only then that we will ever really know the real Jesus. A band called Downhere have a song in which they ask “Oh can anybody show me the real Jesus?” the answer to that is yes, the bible can and your answers are all there